Photographic copy letter from the ship 'Simmonds' off the island Tybee, Georgia, to 'V' [Varanese - the pen-name of Sally Kirkham]. God has preserved 'an unhappy, unthankful wretch' from many dangers and brought him to this place to 'renew his complaints'. He knows that Sally will thank God for this deliverance even though Charles himself cannot, for he has fled in vain from himself to America and is full of misery. He does not repent embarking on this undertaking for he can expect no better in England - wherever he goes he carries his personal Hell with him. He takes comfort in nothing except thoughts of 'S' [Selima - the pen name of Anne Granville] and Sally herself.
He has now fled from the reproaches of his friends, and feels that it is only to Sally that he can pour out his heart. It is no loss that he will soon be separated from those who are dear to him, for 'their example is a reproach'.
Apart from Sally and 'S' [Selima] he feels that he has no relations or friends in England, to whom he can write or derive any comfort from thoughts of. Spiritual matters are discussed in detail.
He cannot account for the 'strange expansion of heart wch I feel in ye midst of my wishes for your welfare…I know no pleasure but in…consciousness that I love you'.
Charles has enclosed C's journal [probably J W, whose pen-name among his friends was Cyrus], and that may make amends for Sally's pain in reading this letter. Charles cannot bear to think of John's happiness and even derives some pleasure at the prospect at soon being removed from the sight of it.
February 14, Peeper's Island 1/47
At present he is enjoying an opportunity for some relaxation. He looks back with horror on the depression that produced the above words, but will allow them to remain as a picture of a soul, which can never be reserved towards Sally.
The immediate work facing him is the spiritual oversight of fifty poor families, and among these Charles will himself either be 'converted or lost'. He feels that pride and 'invincible sensuality' stands between him and God.
She should allow no-one to see her journal except those whom she can really trust, and one day he may tell her the reason why.
If there is time he will transcribe J W's reasons for coming to North America - 'O yt I could say they were mine too'.
Notes
- Publication Record: Transcribed in Proceedings of the Wesley Historical Society, Volume 25, pp.17-20, and also by John R. Tyson in Charles Wesley - A Reader (1989), pp.61-63. An article by Dr Frank Baker discussing the authorship of the letter appears in the same volume of The Proceedings of the Wesley Historical Society between pages 97 and 102. Also, quoted by Dr Frank Baker in Charles Wesley - As Revealed by his Letters (1948), pp.22-23.
- Custodial history: The original was found in Warwickshire in 1944, and was subsequently deposited with the archives of the Methodist Missionary Society, now at the Library of the School of Oriental and African Studies, University of London.
- Sally Kirkham, the daughter of the Vicar of Stanton in Gloucestershire, was a very close friend of John and Charles Wesley during their time at Oxford. Her brother Robert was a member of the Holy Club. Source: Encyclopedia of World Methodism (1974).
- Anne Granville was introduced to the Wesley brothers during their visits to the home of Lionel Kirkham, rector of Stanton in Gloucestershire. She was the neice of Lord Lansdowne, and the sister of Mary Delany, who had been romantically linked with John Wesley. Source: Encyclopedia of World Methodism (1974), and John R. Tyson, Charles Wesley - A Reader (1989), p.61.